Reflections

I usually pride myself on talking honestly about things that are hard (i.e. motherhood). However, I hope I don't come across as overly negative about my life. I want my blog stalkers and children (more so children) to know exactly how I feel so none of my "honesty" is misinterpreted.

Simply put.... I love my life. I've spent today reflecting on the day-to-day monotony and struggles of being a stay-at-home Mom and how much it entails...and how I really feel about it. As hard as it can be sometimes....it's the only job I ever dreamed of having when I was growing up. So, in other words...I'm living my dream.

Yes, we are in the midst of the drama/battles with Addison. Sometimes I'm amazed at how much every little detail involves a battle. And I secretly hope we leave this phase when she turns 3 in a couple of months. Yes, the house is usually messy and I'm always trying to be okay with that which is usually still a struggle. Yes, Jonas has entered into this screaming phase just for the fun of it and it's draining on my ears lately. Yes, the days are long and most of the time I'm counting down until bedtime.

However, on the flip side of it, I'm extremely grateful for all these things and more. Today was our self proclaimed "lazy day" and I spent most of it just thinking and counting my blessings. Realizing that nothing was really pressing or scheduled. Looking at the toys and messy house thinking how grateful I was to have kids that are there to make it messy. Just stopping to take joy in the journey. So, I wanted to share a bit about what I love about each of my family members...

John - I'm one lucky lady. How many people can say that they enjoy hanging out with their husband? If we weren't married, I definitely would want him as a friend...I'm lucky to have both. He's a very hard worker and rarely ever misses a day of work. He provides for our family financially as well as every other possible way. He's a great father. I couldn't have picked a better one. He has the energy to come home and play with the kids after a long day at work. He never expects dinner on the table or a clean house waiting for him. He's not perfect and I love that he realizes this as well. He's always trying to be better and work harder at everything. He loves his family, he loves my family, he loves our family. He gives me lots of breaks and nights out with the girls while manning the home front. And then spends the next day going on and on about how much work it entails and how grateful he is for everything I do. He's always good about appreciating me and complimenting me. Sometimes I accuse him of having his "love goggles" on when he tells me I'm pretty as I'm unshowered, in sweats, messy hair, and no make-up. And I love that about him.

Addison - Who could have created a sweeter girly? She's everything I would have picked for my oldest child. She tries sooo hard to be good and do good. She always tells us how much she loves us. She tries so hard to be independent and do everything herself. She loves her brother and it shows. She adores her Daddy and has such a great relationship with him. Every time I pull into our neighborhood on our way home she'll shout from the backseat "Thank You for driving down da road Momma! Dat's so nice to you!" Same spot, every time. She loves to give and receive cuddles. She loves to wrestle and play rough but also loves frilly dresses and loves the color pink. Tonight in her prayers she said "Please help Daddy to go to work, help Mommy to get me donuts....chocolate donuts...." She has the most hilarious prayers and loves to say them "all by myself". When blessing the food she will always say "help to bless da food and make us strong" while growling the word "strong" and flexing her muscles. I always have to peek every time she does this. I love it. She's growing up so much but I love seeing her go through each phase. I hope she recovers from our parenting mistakes as we learn along with her.

Jonas - He's the most perfect little boy I could have ever imagined. He has a scrunchy nose smile that just melts me every time. He's starting to get more mobile and I'm loving it. He's rolled a few times but still struggles with sitting up and hasn't even been tempted to crawl yet. He's so adorable and so easy going. I think the "boy" is starting to come out since he has now acquired this high pitch squeal that he does just to be heard. He's rarely ever upset and is always happy. He's a good sleeper, eater, cuddler, you name it - he's perfected it. He's a big boy. My arms ache after carrying him or his carrier with him in it. He needs to start walking soon so I can take a break! He loves to have books read to him. He loves his baths and loves to sit and splash away and play before he gets soaped up. I love how his hair is so thin that it stands up in the back. I'm definitely understanding how little boys can turn their Momma's into putty. I can't wait to see his personality come out even more as each day passes.

So, in summary, I am grateful for my life and the blessings Heavenly Father has given me. Although I may struggle along the way or have days where I just want to beat my head against a wall, I love my job. I'd never trade it for another. I'm glad I have the opportunity to stay home with my kids. I can't really think about anything I could want more that I don't already have. I'm blessed.

Apparently I use Zip Loc bags a lot. I didn't realize this until Addison went and got one and put her shake in it while muttering something to Jonas about "saving it for later". ;-)

Desperate times call for desperate measures. I learned the hard way that Jonas isn't quite old enough to sit in the shopping cart at Walmart. After lugging him in one arm and pushing the cart with the other while pouring sweat, I had to get creative when it was time to go to the car with the groceries. Thank heaven for older sisters!